This Month's New Thought Essay

Every so often, Life turns me around. Life changes my plans, cancels my reservations, derails my train, and rains on my parade. Life gives me what I need instead of what I thought I wanted. Life is wiser than me. It sees farther ahead, where I can’t see. When I look back later, then I see. Then I can recognize the collapse of my well-laid plan as the blessing it actually was.

Life has turned me around and faced me in the right direction a number of times when I was forging ahead like a 40-car freight train, with no idea where I was going, really. And where I was trying to go, had I gotten there, would have proven to be a dead-end for me, body and soul. Instead Life opened another door, one I had not consciously chosen, or perhaps even seen before.

That is not to say it was easy – or clear. I have come through some pain, some loss and sorrow, uncertainty, confusion, and terrifying fear. I’ve had my share of lonely times and I have had some hard miles traveling.

But sometimes what looked and felt like a disaster, or a massive failure, turned out to be a magnificent unexpected opportunity to grow, one I would not have had the courage to choose without being pushed by life or by necessity. Having to look inside myself when there was no other place to go, I learned to trust what I found there. Down inside the depths of me, I found (what everyone finds when we go that deep) the direct connection to all of God. All strength, all courage, all help, waiting for me to discover it.

Sometimes Life/God/the Conscious Universe gives me what I need instead of what I thought I wanted. Troubles in life redirect me and reconnect me, lovingly if not always gently. Depending on how far I’ve taken myself off course, there may be pain in the turning.

I make mistakes. Life corrects my course. God/Life does not make mistakes. I know this. But because I’m just me, and still learning how to see, sometimes it takes a while before I can see it.

After I have lived a while I can look back from the crest of a different hill, and see the landscape behind me clear and plain. The miles, the storms, the rocks and rivers I stumbled over and struggled through are beautiful from here. They were the way I came to where I am, and I will go on from here until forever.

this Month's New Thought Essay, Poetry, and Blog. Darkhorse Press New Poets